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Effective Parenting
By peace | August 6, 2007
4 Rs of Effective Parenting
Children who misbehave are a source of endless frustration to their parents who are constantly faced with a choice of punishing them or giving in. Many parents do not know what to do with children who are often unco-operative, inconsiderate, noisy, petulant, irresponsible or defiant.
Advice to parents are mostly obtained via the media, from books, courses and even from friends or relatives. Despite that, many parents still do not understand their children. One suggestion by Dr. Maurice Balson is that parents must turn from traditional autocratic methods of child raising to approaches which emphasis individual responsibility, co-operation, respect, self-discipline and equality. According to him, our traditional methods of raising children are no longer effective and new methods are only slowly being learned. He believed that if we are to have better children, parents have to become better educators.
Although parents are in the best position to foster the healthy development of their children, many are not adequately equipped with the knowledge, technique and skills to do so. They have been deskilled by the vast social changes which have left them searching for a framework which they might use in understanding the behaviour of their children and in assisting with their development.
At Monash University, the Parent-Teacher Education Centre, through its courses, “The 4 Rs of effective parenting” has identified the four characteristics which children develop. The 4 Rs are attainable when parents treat children respectfully, give them responsibility, require them to use their own resources to solve problems and accept them unconditionally.
The four Rs in Children are:
1. Respect
Children treat others fairly, are considerate of the feelings of others, and do not permit themselves to be mistreated.
2. Responsibility
Children contribute freelyl to their families and to family living, are helpful and co-operative.
3. Resourcefulness
Children are independent, self-reliant and full of living. They extend themselves, initiate activities, and confidently meet new situations.
4. Responsiveness
Children co-operate to meet the needs of each situation, devote time to help others, they like people and are friendly, affectionate and loving.
The goals of respect, responsibilities, resourcefulness, and responsiveness give direction to parents in their relationships with their children.
