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Money Hard To Earn
By peace | September 13, 2007
Money Hard To Earn From Friends, Relatives, Families (or close relations)
As the Chinese always says that working for friends, relatives or people whom you know well is always the hardest. This is because it is very hard to draw a line between work and personal relationship. Often, good things are taken for granted and bad things are always remembered and not forgotten.
I am not lazing when it comes to Tuition for Valerie. I treat her like any other students. I am always impartial. As it is all about family relations, I am not so particular about strict timing too. But still work is work. There must be a limit. I have my own work to do, my own family commitment — I have my own children to look after. Even though, they had asked me for help, I had tried my best to extend what is considered extra work, beyond tuition job scope even. I had even take time to buy exam papers for them. I do not know if I am going to be paid for that, but even if they don’t pay in the end, I am going to be fine since we are all kins. Valerie is my niece.
But I just feel treated like taken for granted. For taking up this tuition assignment, my time since tuition started, had been devoted to Valerie. I bought exam papers for her, I was told to call up the girl (who sell the exam papers), I had to keep in touch with Valerie’s mother everyday for Valerie’s progress — this is like writing report everyday. Normally after tuition, I had to rush my tasks. When Valerie comes to tuition, I will not do my work. I will only do my tasks after she goes home.
Today, again Valerie’s mother asked me to call her. Today Valerie was late for tuition. Her father said he must be trying to delay for tuition. Valerie told me she was released late. Well, I of course do not know the truth. However, regardless of the time she came, I still gave her 2 hours of tuition at least. Her father called at about 5.45pm to say that he would be late to fetch Valerie, if she wanted to wait for him. But he wanted Valerie to stay late, cannot go back home early — so that she will study at my home. He also told me that Valerie will not study when she went back home. After completing her homework, she would watch television programmes. Well, as her tuition teacher, I would want her to do her work. As her aunt and tuition teacher, I also want to see her pass her Mathematics, as well as all subjects. Even if she is not related to me, I was just as concerned with my tuition students years back. I even reward my students with gifts when they had scored well in their examination results.
Frankly speaking, the parents never questioned me. Asking about their children’s performance happens only once or twice just to get updates for some parents. I have a few parents who never fail to show appreciation for teaching their children. During Chinese New Year, they gave me gifts. During Mooncake Festivals, they gave me mini-mooncakes too. During Teachers’ Day, they also taught their children to give me presents. I really feel happy teaching those students years back. We laughed, we joked and I also scolded them when they were naughty or did not do their work. But for older students, I did not scold them. They were old enough to know what to do. My job was to teach them in their studies and not in discipling them that much, though I will give them advice every now and then.
But I was actually quite sad about just now when Valerie’s mother never even said a “goodbye” at Msn messenger. She just left without a word. This just got to show that she was unhappy with me — this is what I thought. I was so busy that I had taken time aside to talk to her — putting my uncompleted task aside. I had 3 tasks today. In the morning I tried to finish one, before Valerie came. After Valerie went back, I quickly try to complete my tasks. I even had to miss watching the 9pm show when I was talking to her about Valerie. She wanted me to call my brother to explain to him about everything. This means that I had to end up ‘reporting’ to two person. I had already paid so much attention to Valerie. I am so tired, so do Valerie. But no appreciation was given. It was like “It is my job, my duty to do so.” Actually, my job is just to teach her, and for those days that were promised before hand. But now they have taken more steps forward, going to have weekends as well.
But like I say, I am fine with it if I am free, but I don’t like it if they take it for granted — just like leaving Msn messenger without even saying a “goodbye”. Even friends say goodbye to each other. I did not even know that she left. That is why I say it is hard to earn money. It is even harder to earn the money of kins and friends. Where is the line? It is hard to draw a line. If you draw a clear line, you stand to hurt relationships. But what if you are too kind? You do more, you are not appreciated. You do less, people not happy. You make mistakes, they blame you. This is difficult money. I would rather not earn this money if I know this would end up in this state. I do not like to have unhappy relationships. But regardless of how they think, my conscious is clear. I have done what I am supposed to do, and I have taught her what I had planned. To be able to finish with all revision, right from the day she came for tuition, I had already planned the days. I always believe in planning. I hope Valerie will improve in her Mathematics and show progress in her Final Examinations too.
This is why many sales people never sells to family members. When I was working as financial advisers, it is hard to get business from family, relatives and close friends. It was always easier to sell to acquaintances and strangers. I get more business from the cold markets, from people whom I know little. If I had to rely on friends and close relations, I would not have any sales. Family business does exist, but it takes take. Friends, relatives and families will support your business when they see that you are stable in your business and that you are successful. However, there are always exception. If you want to succeed in anything, you must have no fear and you must always try.
Topics: All Posts, Business, Personal | 2 Comments »
September 24th, 2007 at 7:40 pm
[...] I am full of grievance. At seven when the parents came, they gave me the money for next month tuition. I had regretted. I wonder how much they would honour what they said given the first month experience. And again last night I had savoured it. Their maid will be going back to Indonesia for holidays. For two weeks they will not have any maid. For two weeks, the mother need to work from home. But she want me to teach Vanessa as well. Examination is next week and she wanted me to teach her. Well, the same old story. I am not running a charity centre nor childcare centre. You want to have more time, you want your children to excel, and you push everything to me. If this is going to be like that, I am going to say NO to future tuition. I must learn to say “NO”. It is not a matter of only Money. It is time and family. I need to think of my family, my children too. I really feel so bad, so sorry for my children, if the coming weeks are going to be like that again. It is not a matter of endurance anymore. I must weigh everything. I cannot let a little decision like that to create a major effect on my family. [...]
October 11th, 2007 at 8:46 pm
[...] It was such a stressful months for the past two months teaching her. By teaching her tuition, she is another of my kid, my ‘adopted’ kid. How can I not be stressful? Now that her exam are over and she had scored well, I heaved a sign of relief. However, as I had mentioned in my post, my stress is just half-over. My children’s exams are not over yet. I do not have much time with my children. I do not blame them if they had not done well. I just hope that they can pass all subjects. [...]